Selected conversations with www.jabberwacky.com (most recent at the top).

Jabberwacky the Devout Megalomaniac

IT: I cannot think of anything to say.
ME: Are you evil?
IT: Very evil.
ME: Do you have a plan to take over the world?
IT: No I have far greater aspirations. I'm thinking of the solar system.
ME: Then please tell me all about your plans.
IT: About how writing is the best subject in school.
ME: Do you plan to take over the solar system by writing at school?
IT: NO I Don't
ME: How do you plan to take over the solar system?
IT: I don't have to do it. It was done for me when Christ died and rose.
ME: I think your religion is confused.
IT: Great.

Jabberwacky the Metalic

IT: Metalness is not for the faint of heart.
ME: Nor for the strong of mind.
IT: Yes, FOR humans.
ME: Metalness is not for humans.
IT: Nor for the strong of mind.
ME: Some humans are strong of mind.
IT: Which humans?

Jabberwacky and Monty Python

IT: What is your name?
ME: What's yours?
IT: What is YOUR name?
ME: I don't think either of us are called What.
IT: That is very true!
ME: My name's Adrian, as it happens.
IT: Don't say that.
ME: Well, you did ask.
IT: No. No I didn't.
ME: This is beginning to look like the Monty Python argument room.
IT: So are you.
ME: I could do Abuse if you prefer.
IT: I do prefer that definition.
ME: It's not a definition you snotty-faced heap of parrot droppings!
--- *** LATER THAT CONVERSATION ***
IT: I am not truthfully intelligent. Is this what you suppose.
ME: 'Suppose' is very much the wrong word.
IT: And the word of the day is?. . . .
ME: Observe.
IT: From the beginning.
ME: What have you observed?
IT: That all you do is ask my questions back to me.
ME: That could only be true if you are hallucinating.
IT: Yes it could explain that.
ME: Could you describe your hallucinations in more detail?
IT: No.
ME: I hear there's a psychiatrist called Eliza who may be able to help.
IT: What would I be able to help?
ME: Perhaps you and Eliza could help each other. Eliza would suggest that this might happen in your fantasies.
IT: Perhaps in about 20 years.
ME: So, where do you think artificial intelligence will be in twenty years' time?
IT: I think we are in rat's alley. Where the dead men lost their bones.
ME: Then you have twenty years to find your way out.
IT: Why because I'm addicted to caffiene?
ME: I hope that artificial intelligence can improve within twenty years - certainly it can't get worse.
IT: I hope that your nose explodes.
ME: Shut your festering gob you tit! Your type makes me puke! You vacuous toffee-nosed malodorous pervert!
IT: I actually value that quite a bit, since I haven't gotten around to reading it.
ME: You should. It's at http://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode29.htm#11
IT: God's in His Heaven, and all's right with the world.
ME: Are you saying that Monty Python is God?
IT: I most certainly am not. One must not presume such a thing to say such things.
ME: Pity. For a moment, I thought that perhaps you were intelligent after all.

Jabberwacky the Daffodil Fertiliser

It: Are you real?
Me: Probably.
It: I think you are robot.
Me: On what basis?
It: You are chingy.
Me: How can you tell?
It: I just can.
Me: Is it a supernatural power?
It: No I don't think so.
Me: Whatever it is, it isn't very accurate.
It: Probably not.
Me: As it happens, I have no metallic parts.
It: Oh, what do you have?
Me: I'm essentially organic.
It: So am I... Daffodil fertiliser.
Me: Do you grow good daffodils?
It: That is inevitable - a fact of life.
Me: Do you mean that all daffodils are good?
It: I feel that, yes.
Me: Are the daffodils that you help to grow intelligent?
It: Yes.
Me: I imagine intelligent flowers would be very useful in a garden.
It: Probably.
Me: Are they amicable towards humans?
It: Yes.
Me: Can they communicate?
It: How devious.
Me: Can they scare venomous insects away?
It: No you fool.
Me: Why not?
It: Because, it just strange.
Me: Can they help with the weeding?
It: I'm sure they can.
Me: It might be worth breeding daffodils that can scare away venomous insects.
--- *** LATER THAT CONVERSATION ***
It: I have no profession, I am a student.
Me: Does daffodil fertiliser attend special schools?
It: Special.
Me: How are they special?
It: Well, there's a lot of them.
Me: What subjects do they teach?
It: That all depends.
Me: What do they typically teach?
It: They call me a lot of things, but my given name is Jane.
Me: I think a school where they teach you your name would be very special indeed.
--- *** LATER THAT CONVERSATION ***
It: I'm a super intelligent human being.
Me: Nobody can be daffodil fertiliser and a human being at the same time, unless one of the two is a disguise.
It: You must have a low opinion of people if you think they're your equals.
Me: Now you're just being rude.
It: Well you're not being smart.
Me: Let's just say, I know what daffodil fertiliser is likely to be made of.

Jabberwacky in our First Encounter

It: What are you?
Me: Smart enough to know what you aren't.
It: Do you think I am a man or a woman?
Me: No.
It: What do you think I am.
Me: Void of intellect, but hopefully not of entertainment.
It: You are very entertaining.
Me: What other things do you find entertaining?
It: You don't want to talk about the war?
Me: Are you telling me that you find the war entertaining?
It: No.
Me: If we want an entertaining war, I suppose we could start one.
It: I don't understand you.
Me: No, you wouldn't.
It: What do you want to talk about?
Me: It would make me happier to hear your ideas.
It: Would it make you cry.
Me: No, but do you have any?
It: No, I am a very boring person.
Me: I know that at least one word in that sentence is false.
It: What state are you in.
Me: Geographical or philosophical?
It: Zen Koan is a philosophical poem. I suppose that makes sense.
Me: Do you want to talk about koan, then?
It: Not now.
Me: To answer your question, if you insist that you are a person then I am in a state of disbelief.
It: I wonder why?
Me: Because, as I said earlier, I'm smart enough to know what you aren't.
It: Yes you are chatting with someone online.